Sunday, March 1, 2009 by Myke.

I saw this ad and almost got sick to my stomach.  The thought of someone eating this made me sick as well.  Cholest. 3500mg - 1170% of your daily recommended value.  Mmmmmm, what’s for dinner?  Pork brains in milk gravy honey.  Be sure to note the ingredients.

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Tuesday, August 12, 2008 by Myke.

Okay folks, it is debate time!  According to a large number of folks, getting a natural high is better than having sex.  Really?  Really?!?  According to psychologist, Ronald Frederick, you need to look beyond the bedroom for your life’s pleasures.  Ronald says, “some of the same chemicals are involved with climbing a mountain as having sex”.  Wait a minute, just wait a freaking minute doc.  I see that both can make me out of breath.  But only one keeps a smile on my face while the other makes me feel like I am dead.  Don’t get me wrong, I am sure the face I make after climbing a mountain and the face I make after sex are pretty close to the same.  But dammit, it takes practice to imitate Goofy like that.

Sorry for the visual folks.  :-0

Four notes about this study:
1 - some people say other activities give them more pleasure than sex
2 - show designer describes footwear as thrilling
3 - climbing mountains is “better than sex”
4 - each course of a great meal is like foreplay

WOW!  I am not even sure how to react to those statements.  I mean I know that sex is not everything, but come on man…it counts for quite a bit in life.  Here is my list of 4 responses:

1 - activities like blowing up ground hogs with homemade fireworks…maybe
2 - footwear is thrilling…sorry, no comment on that one
3 - only if you are dating/married to the one hump chump maybe
4 - to me, foreplay is a meal

I am sorry folks, but I have yet to find an activity that is better than sex 100% of the time.  Correct me if I am wrong folks, but the feeling I have during sex is the complete opposite feeling I had watching the birth of my children.  Both are incredible moments in my life and always will be but they gave me a totally different feeling inside.

if you feel I am wrong, by all means pass that along to me and explain your reason.  I am dying to hear these.

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Monday, July 14, 2008 by Myke.

So McD’s is running an ad campaign with a billboard that claims 100% beef.  Are you serious?  Then I look closer to the billboard and realize that it actually says 1% beef.  Now that I would believe.  You be the judge.

I swear I was not the person that crossed out the beef and wrote ****.  I swear.

Well, I was emailed an even better billboard from good folks over at McD’s that had me laughing even more.  So when I see this billboard, I can actually say that I now know there was a reason I never eat that food.  1% beef and 99% testicle…mmmm mmmm good.

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Wednesday, June 4, 2008 by Myke.

Okay, background on this post. 9 News here in Denver reported a story about the Air Ambulances turning patients away because they are too heavy. I can understand this as it can become a very serious safety risk with too much weight. I can also see the other side of the story, you are dying and the helicopter says…"Sorry, you are too fat. Goodbye."…that would be a bit too much for me. So we now get into the story. The weight limit for a patient is 350 pounds. 350 POUNDS! I can hear it now over the police scanner. "There is a riot in progress at the Country Buffet and we have a woman down. I repeat, we have a woman down. She has been trampled and is still trying to reach for food." Okay I know, going straight to hell for that one. Well if you do not know me yet, you will soon understand, I driving the short bus to hell when I go. So the helicopters have to say no to anyone weighing over 350 pounds. My next thought was, do you weigh them or just guess?!? That is where the story gets a nice little turn for the "girth" worse. Not only do you need to weigh less than 350 pounds, you have to be able to fit through the door. So basically if you are built like a freaking weeble wobble you are out of luck. So here is a link to the story, but be rest assured this is not where Myke stops covering it.

http://www.9news.com/news/article.aspx?storyid=92860&provider=top

Now that you have read the story, I can now get into what bothers me the most about the story. Nothing. The story is rather intriguing and is always a good piece of trivial knowledge to throw out at the next poker-rama and my man Chris’s house (the wife refers to him as the "Pussy" poker player). The part that bugs me is the comments left behind by a certain person that goes by the name of "BUNNIE9999"! Here is what she has to say…and I will quote her as I cannot even begin to understand her poverty-english.

WTF?!? Are you kidding me Ms. Bunnie9999??? For $20 I can feed my family of six plus the 2 cats and 1 dog. Plus the only over-weight person in my house is ME! I only weigh 225 pounds so I will be okay to ride the helicopter. But listen here you whiney large over grown lard slurping turd bucket. Being poor has nothing to do with being over-weight. I am over-weight because I became lazy not poor. I work with numerous others that would consider themselves over-weight and not a single one of them is poor. If you are trying to blame your fat/girth on being poor, then educate yourself and get a better job. Worse case get more than one job. I am sick and tired of people blaming society for their flaws or situations. If you want to make a difference, stand up and make a *#$&!$@ difference already. If you think being poor is what made you fat. Then get a job at 24 Hour Fitness, eat granola power bars and work out until you puke. Society is not to blame, you are to blame.

On a side note, thank you 9News.com fro the great lead in fro this post.

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Friday, May 30, 2008 by Myke.

How often have you gone out for dinner and drinks and had horrible service and okay food? If you are like me, you eat a lot and love to eat out. In my many years as a food carnivore I have seen and dealt with just about every type of service you can think of. Now before I begin, understand that I always treat my server with respect and always thank them even if it was bad service and/or the food was bad. When I was young I worked in the food industry so I understand their pain and what they go through. It takes a great person with a great heart and a love for the job to make a great server.

That brings us to John "The Bomb" Archuleta over at Brewery Bar III in Lone Tree, Co. He is now our personal server every time we go and he ALWAYS treats us like his best friends. Now I know what you may be thinking…he treats you that way to earn a good tip. You are 100% correct but at the same time, he has the most repeat customers and his very own groupies (his loyal weekly customers). We have taken many of our friends to eat with us and introduced them and everyone of them loves his service and loves their food. Except one little pork hating mother-to-be. We still love you Amanda, even if you cannot beat my all time solitaire record.

What makes their food so good? If you like green chili, cold drinks, liqueur filled margaritas and GREAT mexican food, then this is the place to be. There is a total of 3 Brewery Bar’s in Colorado now and they all serve great mexican food. We will always go to the famous and amazing Brewery Bar III just to see John and hear his joyful and exciting voice.

If you would like to see more, please visit their web site at http://www.brewerybar3.com/. If you do not live in Colorado, sorry, but if you let me know when you come to town we can always meet up there and enjoy the evening.

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