Another bailout looming

If you thought the bailout plan for the automakers was crazy, wait until you see who wants help now.  Hustler publisher Larry Flynt and Girls Gone Wild CEO Joe Francis.  That’s right folks, the Porn King and the Sluts in the Bar King are asking for $5,000,000,000.00 to bailout the porn industry.  *laughing my ass off right now*  I can actually see these two sitting in front of the Senate with their pinkies cocked to the side of their mouths like Dr Evil and saying they need 5 billion dollars to save the porn industry.  I am having a real hard time picturing this actually.  How do you honestly go in front of the Government and ask for money to save the porn industry???  I mean seriously…how is the porn industry hurting?  They play movies on Skin-a-max, Whoretime and you can download just about anything you want online.  I was recently at an adult store and the place was crowded and people were buying movies like crazy.

Okay, so I can see that maybe you will have to trim down your budget for the next skin flick but come on…it is not like you spend much anyways.  I realize some are over the top budget flicks but they are not like today’s $150,000,000.00 productions we see in the theater.  I have seen some recently, I mean my friend Chris has told me about some recently that look like they were shot in someones basement.

I mean, the porn industry asking for money to bail them out of trouble is like Jean Claude Van Dam pissing about how the Oscars are fixed and he deserved to win over Clint Eastwood.  Come on guys, pull your Viagra inflated cocks out of the 18 year old drama class drop outs and think about what you are asking for.

Understand, I enjoy some skin on TV but to say we need to give you 5 billion dollars is just retarded.

Porn industry seeks federal bailout

Posted: 03:00 PM ET

From CNN’s Rebecca Sinderbrand and Mark Preston

Larry Flynt is asking for a bailout.

WASHINGTON (CNN) — Another major American industry is asking for assistance as the global financial crisis continues: Hustler publisher Larry Flynt and Girls Gone Wild CEO Joe Francis said Wednesday they will request that Congress allocate $5 billion for a bailout of the adult entertainment industry.

“The take here is that everyone and their mother want to be bailed out from the banks to the big three,” said Owen Moogan, spokesman for Larry Flynt. “The porn industry has been hurt by the downturn like everyone else and they are going to ask for the $5 billion. Is it the most serious thing in the world? Is it going to make the lives of Americans better if it happens? It is not for them to determine.”

Francis said in a statement that “the US government should actively support the adult industry’s survival and growth, just as it feels the need to support any other industry cherished by the American people.”

“We should be delivering [the request] by the end of today to our congressmen and [Secretary of the Treasury Henry] Paulson asking for this $5 billion dollar bailout,” he told CNN Wednesday.

Come on people, help me out.  How does this make sense?  Why would the porn industry need 5 billion dollars?  For what?  For who?  Someone…please help me.

This entry was posted on Wednesday, January 7, 2009 at 15:01 and is filed under Rant, Funny. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response or trackback from your own site.

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